the hurdles.

i want to be able to put words on paper and have people read them and look and me and have to say nothing because they can express it all with their eyes but i cannot because all my words have no happiness in them. they are sad weak words that cannot even back themselves up. you can try and read really deeply into it and find some glimmer of happiness but it is hard and i regret to inform you that sometimes that is how i intend them to be. we look at things and we see the beauty and we see the potential but every now and then someone needs to point out that their are bad things in this world. people, people die and there is nothing we can do about it.. we can maybe treat them for a few years and give them the gift of seeing a loved ones wedding or greeting a new one into the world but then it is rip away from them and it cruel.. the world is cruel and i am sorry if you dont agree with me i just need a moment to vent and if this has upset you thus far i suggest reading no further. also out there in this world we "live" in there are things that we cannot fix, no matter how much we want too and i am not just talking about the obvious things like global warming and all the homeless and less fortunate people.. i am talking about the deeper things that are a little less important then the things i previously listed but things that are still important none the less. things like emotions and fears and things that are not brought up in normal conversation because people dont care or because people are like me and they are scared, physically scared that if they bring up anything of the sort that they will be judged or shunned or anything of the sort. isnt it lame that human beings can make other human beings feel this way? maybe they  feel this because it has happened to them or maybe because they are now scared that there is a big chance it may happen to them. but those small things are just as important as the bigger things. my dear friend once said, "this is a grotesque world; we are born and we watch people die then we die ourselves." and that is the phrase that i leave you with...

just think,
madeline louise