somewhere.

i want to go somewhere where it doesn't matter that i know that i can make my hurting go away; somewhere i won't be tempted to use my knowledge. 

sincerely,

madeline louise.

madeline's death experience

madeline's death experience

symptoms:

• rash
• sore body
• tiredness
• headache
• cramps
• (constant) bathroom breaks

DAY ONE:

i woke up this morning (approximately 2 a.m.) with cramps and a very large headache. i went to the bathroom. i was there for a while; i ended up just sleeping in there (when i could sleep in between my many a bathroom breaks). i have put together a hypothesis on what. i believe, is going to happen over the course of this illness.

STAGES:

1. rashes will appear

2. when using the bathroom i will begin to lose everything in my system (including stomach content, vital organs, etc.)

3. my sore body will be the result of my  body (slowly) withering away.

4. i will become nothing more than an empty skin suit. like something you see in a syfy dr.who-stargate type show.

1-4. during this whole process i will have head-aches that will eat away at my brain.

i have prepared myself for this journey mentally and physically. 

may the lord have mercy on me,

madeline louise